Opposite Day
by LordYuuma
Summary: What would happen, if the El Party decided to do the complete opposite of what they normally do and the laws of the world followed in a similar fashion, especially regarding PVP? Can balance be upheld or will it end in a disaster? One Shot.


It was a nice and normal Opposite Day in Elios. Eve (Code Nemesis) was onehitting each of her opponent with Metal Dust Aura, Elsword (Lord Knight) was Waterbending, Aisha (Void Princess) used her Holy Magic to heal the injured and cure ailments and Rena (Wind Sneaker) gently massaged Raven (Reckless Fist), who was very cool about that, using her feet, being very careful not to hurt him in any way.

Add (Lunatic Psyker) has just finished listening to Beethoven's Fifth, which he played everytime he had to meet Eve in PVP. It was awful. "Is something wrong?", Elesis (Crimson Avenger) asked him, trying to start a conversation.  
"Do you know these opponents, which keep spamming those particles floating around them?", Add asked.  
"I have never in my life seen such a skill", Elesis responded in a kind manner. Add sighed.  
"If I queue now, I'll just meet her again. Maybe I should just sit around and wait until she's gone. Or upgrade my weapon...", he said. Add looked at his dynamos. They were only upgraded to +11 as he had not enough Flourites to go even further.  
"Your weapon is okay. You just suck as a class", Elesis said.  
"Are you trying to insult me?", Add asked.  
"I'm just saying the truth. Even though I don't want to admit it, we are all free RP to her", Elesis answered. Both of them sighed, as they knew it was true.

"I keep missing my opponent, even though they stand right in front of me!", Ara (Sakra Devanam) said, while her Swallow Assault missed for the fifth time in row.  
"I'm sorry, I can't help you", Eve said. She sat behind her (with Metal Dust Aura active) in an area, that mobs would not care about.  
"Can you give me a buff, please?", Ara asked politely.  
"I only have one skill equipped...", Eve responded disappointed by herself. She knew, that everyone was depending on her, yet when things got rough, there was nothing she could do.  
"Is it Metal Dust Aura?", Ara asked.  
"No, Metal Dust Aura is a passive, which is present at all times. I also have Cloaking, though, so I could get invisible", Eve answered. "I find it amusing to approach my opponents while keeping myself hidden. The only downside is, that it costs a lot of MP and I usually don't have the resources to use it", she further explained.  
A random mob appeared and flew past Eve. It got hit by one of her particles and immediately died, dropping a shitload of loot, which was collected by Eve, who just yawned during the process of doing so.  
"Another one of those low +12 Add weapons. I'll just trash it. He doesn't like presents anyway", Eve said to herself, while throwing away half of what she just got.

"Lick my feet!", Ciel (Royal Guard) demanded from Lu (Noblesse), who immediately complied with his request and got down on her knees. As his maid, she had to follow each of the orders he gave to her, but he was usually kind.  
"Yes, keep going", he said and her tongue movements became faster. She carefully licked every toe and even sucked on them, although she really wanted to suck on something else. Her heavy E-sized breasts where pressed against the floor, while she tried to bend down. Seeing how it hurt her, Ciel ordered Lu to stand up again.  
"No, your feet are still dirty", Lu said. "They need to be cleaned properly or else your sweat will begin to smell exactly like that."  
"It's fine", Ciel said, "I'll wash them myself." Lu got up and asked, whether he was serious and he replied with a positive answer, also telling her to brush her teeth or eat some Manamint gum to hide the smell of his feet.

"What's wrong with these hitboxes?", Rena asked. "They are smaller then the actual animation!"  
"I can see it", Chung (Deadly Chaser) responded. "Get near for a Sharpshooter Syndrome. It won't hit unless you're really close." Rena got buffed by Chung, who then drew his Silver Shooters in attempt to do headshots. Unfortunately for him, his aim was awful and he only hit the the armor of his opponent.  
"Stay calm!", Raven shouted. He had 300 MP, so everyone knew, what would be coming. He approached the boss and got near him, hitting him with his dragon arm to get him into position. He shouted "Nuclear!" as he dropped Michael Bay onto the scene, who caused an explosion larger than the Big Bang.

"Eve, have you been doing PVP again?", Elsword asked. "You know that that's dangerous."  
"Why is it dangerous to do PVP as a Nemesis?", Ara wondered. Other mobs were onehitted in the meantime.  
"I think, I can explain", Eve said. "Lord Knight has ridiculously high magic defense. I could hug him all day with the aura active and he'd still stand. Sadly, that makes him the only person I can talk to." Eve sighed. She hugged Elsword for demonstration. He did not even flinch even though he was penetrated by thin pieces of metal over and over and over.  
And again.  
And again.  
And again and again and again.  
And again.

"Look at the cute couple", Add said joining the scene.  
"Please, don't provoke her", Elesis asked of him.  
"Don't worry. My thought circuits are in no way affected by the strange physics of today", Eve said.  
"I happen to have understood what she said", Elsword followed up. Both Add and Elesis were speechless. Elsword sighed, as he then took a step further in his reasoning to realize, that most of today was the opposite of what it should have been.  
"But yes, I would be glad to marry Elsword", Eve said while he was still lost in thought. "Although it should be on a day, when I can get his real consent", she also remarked, hinting that she was unsure whether Elsword would agree on a normal day.  
"Indeed, the effects of the Opposite Day are strong. But there are things, which are stronger, I guess", Elsword said.  
"Like my thought circuits?", Eve asked.  
"Nobody cares about your thought circuits!", Add said.  
"HUG ME!", Eve shouted while jumping onto Add, killing him.

Add respawned in the village, somewhat away from Elsword and Eve. Elesis joined him.  
"What did I say? I'm pretty sure, it was to not provoke them", Elesis said.  
"I'm sorry", Add said. They queued for 2 on 2 PVP, hoping that they would meet somebody else. They met the newly-wed Elsword and Eve.  
"What? Why are you married?", Add asked.  
"Elsword said he wouldn't, so I forced him", Eve said, knowing that Elsword knew, that she would interpret everything he said as the opposite of that as she should on Opposite Day. He thus gave her consent knowingly. She also kept him on a leash, but that is a detail, which may be ignored or fantasized about by the reader.

Eve entered the "sit" command to take a seat on Elsword. Metal Dust Aura still active. Neither Add nor Elesis had any means of attacking them from a distance, so they could either wait for a timeout or do it the quick way and run into Eve, thereby commiting suicide. Elsword and Eve won and got 1024 RP. An unnecessary amount, since both of them had Star Rank anyways.  
We should mention, that Eve did not use any weapon or armor at all. She just cycled through different sets of Avatar. We could state which of these she wore to include more costume porn for a better fapping experience, but unless stated otherwise it's up to the reader to imagine them in something fancy.

In the meantime dungeons were enjoyable, because even though the hitboxes were not the best for our players (Rena, Raven and Chung), the enemies did a humane amount of damage, making it possible to recover after they hit them, even after multiple times.  
"Man, Karis had a good combo", Raven had to admit.  
"Yes, unlike some other person, who just happens to wear her outfit", Rena said and both of them stared at Eve.  
"I'm sorry", said Eve, deeply apologizing. "I would do a combo if I could. But in my current state I just hurt anything around me", she explained. Why did she have these particles, that killed everyone around foolish enough to dare touch her? Eve felt lonely, knowing that only one person in Elios has the power to not die when hugged and she was longing for an embrace. Eve latched onto Elsword and restrained him from moving by pressing him to her body.

Ciel and his maid Lu also joined the conversation. "I'm not sure, but I find Nemesis very balanced", Lu said. She then joined the hug. For some reason she did not die, but Ciel started to bleed.  
"Can I touch your boobs?", Rena asked. "They're so big, unlike mine", she admired the breasts of her companion. Aisha (who had DD) did not know, what was so special about big breasts, so she decided to touch them herself before Rena got the chance to. Rena then grabbed Aisha's breasts and they built a train.  
"Make sure you return Lu in one piece", Ciel demanded from Rena and Aisha. In the meantime he looked at Eve. "Could one Marbas be enough to relieve you from the pain of being the only one to have One Hits?", he asked.  
"Maybe", Eve answered. "I don't really want to test it, though", she quickly added, afraid of Ciel pulling out his big fat gun. Lu should be the only one to have a taste of it.

The day ended with everyone hugging Eve and everyone except Elsword and Luciel dead because of said hug. Luckily, they were all revived by Void Princess' Holy Magic.

"Holy shit, I'm back, motherfuckers!", Add said queueing for PVP against Elesis again and again, winning each of his matches by manaclocking and waiting for Quake Buster. Elsword and Eve did not care. Because of the opposite day, they both had 2147483647 RP, a value, which none of the others would ever reach until next year. Until they would be punished again by Metal Dust Aura.

In the near future, Elsword had his virginity taken by Eve's Metal Dust Aura. He was deeply penetrated. Rena still gave Raven footjobs, although they started to hurt again. Aisha had sex with a sparkling vampire, inspiring the Twilight Trilogy. Ciel was allowed to lick Lu's feet again. Add refrained from doing Elesis, as she was on her period again. But Chung and Ara started to grow a liking in each other, after he impressed her with his large Destroyer to which she responded by showing him, what she was able to do with Eun's tails.

Happy End. Happy, because they had intercourse.


End file.
